Good Old SJS

This is St John’s School, where I spent 11 years of my life.

How I got into this school was this, one day I was watching TV when I noticed that I couldn’t understand any of the stuff they were saying. It was all in English…so I made up my mind to learn more. My dad told me it was the 1st day of my primary 2 year in Chung Hwa Middle School when I walked into my class hand in hand with him, took one look, and told him “I want to study in an English school.”

So that was that. For some reason, I have to go through primary 1 all over again in St John’s (SJS from now on). This is why for the rest of my SJS years I was always a year older than my classmates. In my first day of school I didn’t like the idea of studying with ‘the babies of primary 1’ so I boldly walked into primary 2 class and just sat there until the homeroom teacher came in.
Obviously my name wasn’t on her lists of student and she found out I was suppose to be in primary 1 from the books I was carrying. Got kicked back into the right class. XD

St John’s School was the school that my father went to until form 3 as well. That time the school was run by a catholic priest. The school during his time was old and the church was made of wood. Today’s SJS’s church is quiet nice actually.


Now this is a good school with a good reputation for its solid curriculum back then. Fail Malay? FAIL. Fail English? FAIL. Fail Math? Guess what? FAIL! So yeah since I was very weak in malay, I had to repeat in Form 1 and Form 3. Not my happy years.

*Ahem*

Friendships were a little difficult thing back then. I wasn’t ashamed that my parents weren’t working in some glam job at Shell. Yes, they don’t collect mercedes for a hobby or nim teh with Bill Gates, or whatever the hell rich people usually do. So what? My mother works as a house keeper, my dad is a house painter. They work hard and they put food on the table.

But for some reason, I got friends’ parents who are prejudiced about that. I still feel it today. Yes, they smile and say hello, but I can feel underneath that mask they will do the best they can to keep me from their son/daughter. Like I got malaria or the black plague.

Like talking on the phone and the parent would pick up the other one and put an end to our conversation. Or fail to invite us into their house during CNY and their daughter had to entertain her friends outside the house on the patio.

Or how about telling me not to ‘sit too close’ to their son while playing games (I was holding the magazine with the fighting combos and he was tapping away.) Geez, lady, we’re playing PS2 games, not spin the fuck bottle.


I’m not saying that there weren’t any good friends but when I repeated Form 3, I slowly began to see who my real friends were. My usual ‘gang’ stopped inviting me to ‘hang out’. I slowly lost touch with them because of their superficiality. If they stopped talking to me cuz their parents say “Dun talk to the girl who failed her malay or else you might fail your malay too.” Fine by me. It’s not their fault if their parents were like that. I couldn’t give a shit.

Despite all that, I got good friends too who I still talk to and occasionally hang out today. Funny thing, Patricia and I weren’t very close back in school. Maybe it’s because she was my junior. Haha. Siao Mei Mei (small sister) Whahahahaha. Then there’s also Aaron who never changes. Ho Woei Lin who I can always count on. Leonard who I can trust 120%. (Len, you get to have my diaries when I am no longer around in this world. Ha.) Siew Huey, the girl with the same corny sense of humour as I have. Druba, like batman, knows all, hears all, but no one knows how. Desmond, we still geek out with MTG nights and games.

Good people, living good lives surrounded by good friends with good memories. This is what I got from good old SJS, it was more than just text book.

May All Mothers Be Blessed…God knows they deserve it

I’m a female and one day I may or may not be one. Heck I’m ½ mother already to my sisters so I’m not afraid of future childcare horrors.

“What? You swallowed a torch? Who’s torch? Daddy’s torch? Well, at least now you don’t have to be afraid of the dark anymore.”

Anyway, today is not about me, today is all about Mothers. Old mothers, young mothers, hawt mothers, single mothers, tired mothers, adopted mothers, grandmothers, the mother you never knew, the mother you thought you knew, yeah, all of them.

My mom had a though time with her first two born kids. First one (me) couldn’t wait to see the fire works and insisted in witnessing the coming of the new year. There ya go, one end of the year baby. Only I was born on the 30th, not the 31st.

Mom thought maybe she would be a bit luckier the next round. Well, she was kinda.

My brother came along 5 years later. Smack in the middle of the Chinese New Year Celebrations. How lucky is that? He was the heaviest baby in the ward at the time. Go figure. He’s now a 6 feet tall walking sack of meat.

My mother and I never understand each other. I ceased understanding her when I was about 13 or 14, when she said that one of my sketches looked horrible. Okay, I was 2/3 spoiled at the time. Moving on.

When we were kids, she loved to experiment in cooking and feed us all sort of stuff. My brother and I would laugh over her dishes, cooked up oh so long time ago in her small kitchen of the maid quarters in the Panaga area.

Let’s see…there was the roast chicken in this tiny roasting oven she got. It was black on the outside and raw in the inside. Then there was the pizza where the crust was so hard, we used steak knives to saw through it. In the end we just ate the toppings. (>_<)



Mom is also a superwoman and a ½. When she’s not out rescuing her clients from dust bunnies, she out conquering Shah Bandar (a nature reserve with 11 hills, nature’s creation to challenge you into a fitter lifestyle, or kill you.) with her group of superhero friends. They are the Hashing League. They go out every Wednesdays evenings, fighting bugs and leeches, clay caked hills and muddy paths all in the name of health and fitness. She comes back home grinning from ear to ear. Captain Planet would salute her.

Okay, I admit, my mom is one good looking gal. I guess she’s a tad disappointed that I didn’t follow her footsteps. My dad would tell me stories of how he won mom from her string of admirers. Okay, he might be stretching it a bit, but heck, who cares, its fun to listen. I’ve seen pictures of my mom when she was at my age. There’s little Lady Knife beside her, looking like a teeny tiny whiny chinesey girl with her bob cut. My mom was already a mom of two kids at my age. Damn. I don’t know if I have that kind strength, yet…

I want to say to my mother today “Thanks mom for raising us and putting up with all our crap.”

But I didn’t…cuz she’ll think I’m being sarcastic.

So I bought her flowers instead. Words she might not understand, but actions, yeah, louder than words. Anytime.

Can I Take You And Your Broom Out For Dinner?


Earlier being in a good mood while driving home from work I decided to bring my family out for dinner sometime this sat or next wed. I told my mom when I reached home.

This is how it went:-

"Ma, this sat are you free?”
"Why?”
“I mean are you busy?”
“Depends on what you want to do.”

*Smart*

“I just want to take the family out for dinner. Sushi.”
“How can the kids (somehow my sisters are always referred to as ‘The Kids’ never ‘your sisters’ in this family.) eat those kind of things?”

“Aiya, got the normal stuff also ma, like fried rice.”
“…”

At this moment we both look at each other. A questioning look at another…one can probably picture our silent mental conversation like this:-

*Why all of the sudden you so nice take family out to dinner?*

*I good mood lor, like that also cannot?*
*There’s something you want from me issit?*
*Do you hear me asking you for anything?*
*You killed someone, didn’t you? Knocked down some innocent pedestrian on a bike while driving too fast, issit?*
*Nothing like that!*
*You’re not gonna order something weird and make mommy sick, issit?*

*Why would I want to do that?*
*For fun lor.*
*Aiya! This time I really earnest what. Long time liao I dun treat family to dinner so this time I want to bring mommie out for sushi cuz mommie say never go before and thinks sushi nice to eat, good to experience ma. Plus, mother's day is coming agian.*
*Ok lor, ok lor…*
*…what…why are you looking funny at me like that?*
*Are you gonna bring a guy to introduce to us during this dinner?*
*No such thing!!!*
*Oh ok…cuz if you are then mommy have to tell daddy, he would want to come and see...*
*Already said, no such thing!*

It’s draining I tell you, staring at each other like that, anticipating each other’s next verbal move. Then she said, ok, she think about it, if got something come up this sat, she will let me know.

Later I can hear her sweeping the floor downstairs and it was 11pm. Haiz. Probably so puzzled by my behaviour that she felt she had to do something normal.

Lady Knife the Firefighter

Since working in the BSP area, I’ve been briefed before on the standard safety and precaution regulations set by Brunei Shell Petroleum. They are very particular about this and it’s good because, let’s face it, nobody wants to lose an arm or a leg or a head even while working. Think of the paperwork.

The only time I’ve witness a fire demonstration was when I was in school, and that was like far, far, FAR away from the fire, in a crowded side of the school. One of the teachers would be brave enough to step up and grab the extinguisher. Execute the three ‘P’s, Pull, Point and Press.

Then there was a time when my boss of Dee Jay was smoking in his office and tossed the cig into the waste paper basket without putting it out entirely. We were all wondering where the smell of burning came from before realizing it was from the office. The boss was out at the time. I didn’t see the fire, but then one of the guys came in and put out the fire.

Those are the two scenarios of fire fighting I’ve witnessed.

However, this is different.

First we have a small lecture in the conference room. Interesting stuff, like if I am crawling along in a dark room, I should feel the wall with my palm up and not down. Close all doors when you evacuate the building and how to open the door properly so you don’t become a barbequed kebab by the time you get out.

We had to put on the standard training clothes before moving on to the physical part of the course. I’m glad of this when I saw what we had to do. We had to go through the smoke room. It looks like a normal building from the outside but inside, its pitch black and narrow, with steps, tunnels and various obstacles. It felt like scout endurance course but only in the dark.

I’ve been through something like that before, when I was in a scout leader training camp. We were blind folded and had to walk through the bushes and what not with only a rope to guide us. Along the way, the first person would shout out body count, 1,2,3, and so on. We lost two people from a group of 7 that day. XD

So this time I was a tiny bit worried cuz I was the last one in a line of 7. Worse, I was in a group of giggling ladies from a salon also in the BSP area. You can only imagine what happened in there. There was a lot of giggling, talk and a lot of shushing from my part. (worse, they were all talking in Chinese, giving out instruction in Chinese “Start crawling here!” when they clearly forgot that there are two malay girls in the line as well. Sheesh.) I was hit in the head by someone’s shoe but didn’t mind, cuz at least I didn’t get stuck or left behind. It took us four minutes to get out. Real fire fighters take 45 seconds.

Then all that’s left is the proper handling of the fire extinguishers. Pull, Point and Press. That’s what I did…only the fire didn’t go out like it was suppose to…instead it reignited. *Ack!* Spray, spray, spray some more. Finally it went out.

“This, ladies and gentlemen, is a good example never to turn your back from a fire. You need to make sure to put the fire out once and for all and just back away but always facing the fire.”

*sweat*

There was a lot of rain during the outside fire extinguishing exercise. So in the end I’m all wet and tired but it was lots of fun. So now, when any fire breaks out, my advice, do what I would do, be the first one out of the building. Don’t hero, please.

natsuhiboshi naze akai
yuube kanashii yume wo mita
naite hanshita
akai me wo
natsushiboshi naze mayou
kieta warashi wa sagashitteiru
dakara kanashii yume wo miru

why is the summer star red
last night I had a sad dream
I was crying and talking
with red eyes
why has the summer star lost its way
I know such childish stories
that's why I have such sad dreams

Random Thoughts

Recently a friend suggested that I put all my thoughts into a log or a book, and then when in time of need I can bring out these thoughts to help. I use to do that with my diaries, whenever I am sad or confused, I would write in them until I feel better. It was a safe outlet for sorting out my own confusing emotions during my teenage years.

Over time I got busier and busier with work and games…er, I mean, life, I altogether stopped writing in my last diary.

I’ve always started my entries with ‘dear diary…’ because it seems like I’m writing to my best of best friends, the one who will never judge, criticize or betray me. Then after I read ‘Diary of Anne Frank’, I started the habit of signing off my entries with ‘with love, Felicity.’

Here however, it’s a public journal. So please forgive me if I refrain from publishing my innermost secrets but I will still however like take my friend’s suggestion and blog my random thoughts once in a while. You can choose not to read this as it’s all my own thought manifesting in my brain.

I Want to Live ‘Till Tomorrow

Have you ever met someone you really like and then have that person like you back? I’m not saying girl meet guy kind of feeling but probably someone you might bump into at work or at a school function or even online. It’s one of the greatest feelings in the world. You feel better about yourself, more confident, happier cuz you got to know someone neat like that.

Why is that?

It’s because, unconsciously, we are all looking for acceptance in general society. One step at a time, one person after another, one place after the last.

The most important to us still are our parents acceptance of us. Our flaws, our strengths, our worries, our hopes and dreams. Teach us to get up when we fall down, let us grow in the sunlight and shield us not from the rain. Let us grow and guide us with wisdom.

That is what we human do best, we learn, we adapt, we invent, we survive, we claw our way into existence.

So when we are hurt, we shield or protect what is most important to us. When we find something that makes us feel good, we try to find it again and try to keep it. This behavior, if overindulged turns to greed, is normal in all of us. It’s the basic instinct we are all born with.

We all started out as an empty vessel with nothing but a soul. Without scars, without memories, we all began as a blank book.

But then, what happens when we like someone but that someone doesn’t like us? It’s sad is it not? Worse, what if the person that we like starts to criticize us? Saying things that they don’t really mean but nonetheless hurts us at the most core?

What happens then?

We get on with our lives. The sun will still rise, and then it will still set. Day in, day out, time will pass us by until that bit of wound is healed and we forget what had hurt us in the first place and wonder why we’ve been so petty in the first place.

Yes, it did hurt, but it wasn’t petty, it had meant something to us at the time. It only seems petty, perhaps regretful or shameful now because we’ve become stronger.

Being weak is what means to be human. We are born weak and we will die weak. Our existence is fragile, we are fragile.

So we learn to become stronger. Why? Because we want to protect our existence and the existence of those we love, who are most important to us.

But by being stronger, until we shield everything from us, bad or good isn’t the solution to everything. That is also a weakness.

It’s because human beings are a weak race that is why we have to forgive. We all have flaws. None of us are perfect. Teach each other, learn from each other, apologize and forgive each other, no one is perfect, no one is right, and everyone just wants to live until tomorrow same as everybody else. This is how we survive.

0.5 Year Anniversary of Ragnarok

Yes ladies and gentlemen, 6 mths has gone by in a blink of a virtual eye. A lot of things has happened since I started out, alone and innocent, into the world of Ragnarok.

First I would like to thank those of my guild members who have so graciously and patiently put up with my wishy washy ways and taught me a lot. They accepted me as part of their family where I met good people and had many memorable times. ^_^


Limited as Ragnarok may be, it’s a lot of fun. Although my sucky dail up inhibits my game play, still it doesn’t prevent me from continuing on playing, no matter how frustrated I become. I keep on playing because I still want to meet my friends online in RO, still want to keep on learning, keep on improving myself.

There is just so much to explore and do. I don’t understand how some people would become arrogant and say things like, “sien la, so boring here.” Or “dunno la, see first lor, got no mood to go.” Then why log into RO at all? Might as well just sit and stone at home.

As for me, I’ve incorporated so much of RO into my daily life that my friends and staff at work knows I go for War of Emperiums every Wednesday and Saturday. Haha. They understand inside jokes like “Dying is OK!” I think I’ve actually achieved balance in my virtual and real world.


Favorite places to visit in Ragnarok? I like Payon, Gonryun and Niflheim.

Ro Music? I like the music of Gonryun and Prontera.

Favourite Item? Ack! I don't know! I like them all!

Easiest Job Change? That has to be the swordie change job test. All you have to do is to make sure you WALK properly.

Nicest Quest? Erm, all the ones I've tried are fun actually. Lol.

Most memorable moments? When I got my Ragnarok guidebook, thanks to Ulat and when I got my AI CD, thanks to Eekie! You two rawk!

OMG Moment of the past 6 mths? Spire is married to Popo??? “Pedophile is OK!” *omg!omg!omg!*

Old McDonald had a Garage Sale ...ee, i, ee, i, oooo...

Sorry I haven't been updating my blog lately. There are a few stuff running through my head but as soon as I try to write them down, it just went to pieces. *sigh*

Anyway, I saw this ad on a post board outside a supermarket. Struck me as funny how someone can be selling this so cheap and in such a nonchalant way. Do you have any idea how much it cost just to keep one alive? lol.

Game Rant

Game:- Fatal Frame III : The Tormented
Developer:- Tecmo

Once in a blue moon, my brother would actually manage to do something right. This time he went ahead and got Fatal Frame III : The Tormented. It’s developed and published by Tecmo, which is also responsible for the famous ‘Monster Rancher’ and ‘Dead or Alive’ series.

Main char, a young woman, Rei Kurosawa, spots her dead boyfriend roaming in a haunted mansion. After the incident she visits the ‘spirit world’ only when she sleeps. This storyline offers the player to visit both the scary place and the ‘real realm’. The more she investigates, the more her ‘Curse’ (a painful, yakuza styled, snake like tattoo) spreads on her body.

At first glance I assumed that it’s no different from it predecessor Crimson Butterfly. Perverted spooks walking about, trying to maim you or the least, try to grab the character’s chest. The only thing the she’s got is a torchlight and an old wonky ‘Camera Abscura’.

This is the original part from other survival horror games I’ve played. The camera. To fight it out with the angry spooks the char has to pretend she’s in a photo shoot where all the models sport the latest fashion seen on the catwalks of the netherworld. Blood shot eyes, missing or disjointed limbs and ‘Ju-On’ hair styles are all the rage, baby, yeah!

Take enough fab shots of the spooks strutting their stuff (especially when they come charging at the char with eyes and mouth wide open) and they will moan into disappearance. However, don’t be fooled, unlike in Crimson Butterfly where when you beat a semi-boss spook, it’s gone forever. In The Tormented, they stay tormented, so be snap ready at all times.

Throughout the game you accumulate points and find additional lens to upgrade the camera with making it easier to shoot and beat the spooks.

Another spin in this game is that you don’t stick with one char throughout the whole game. You get to play as a man and a child later on. You would even get to meet the stars from Crimson Butterfly, the twins.

Not recommended for the faint hearted, I played Crimson Butterfly with a natural fear factor like high, but this one has me making excuses to switch it off, only to go back playing it again within an hour.

Friendly Fire

Last evening while I was waiting in line at a supermarket counter when I realized the person right in front of me was my cousin from my mother side.

”Cousin? How nice to see you! Why didn’t you say something? I almost didn’t recognize you. How are you? I heard you just had a baby girl!”

*what am I suppose to say again? Oh yeah congratulations, say it, say it.*

“Ah cousin Knife, sorry there, I also didn’t recognize you. I kept wondering if you are cousin Knife or not. Just haven’t seen you for so long. How are you? Is your mom well?”

*what you mean you didn’t recognize me? I saw you looking at me. If I didn’t take the initiative to say hello, we would be absolute strangers!*

“Yes, she’s just fine. You know hashing and stuff. Haha. Is that your son? What a handsome little man he is.”

*He is adorable. I wish I can go over and coo over him. Hi little darling, I’m your auntie Knife.*

“Yes that’s my son, he’s 1yr old already and that’s my husband there, I would introduce you to him but my in laws are waiting for us in the car, so we’re kinda rushing here. Haha…”

*Woah, that’s her husband? Hold the phone! That is one delicious looking muffin! *

“Oh, er, that’s alright, you go on now, better not keep them waiting but promise you’d drop by the shop for a chat sometime, ok?”

”Sure I will. Bye cousin.”

”Bye.”

Now this got me thinking and I confessed a little worried. This cousin of mine is only older than me by 2 years. Now she’s with two kids and a husband. My mom told me that her hospital room (when she gave birth) was like a florist shop. Flowers everywhere.

What I’m seriously worried about is not about my single status but that of my gossipy aunts. They will probably start asking my mom when her eldest daughter is gonna get hitched? After all she’s 26, er, 25 already and tick tock tick tock dear.

I bet many people hear this all the time. Not only are there sibling rivalry but here we have to deal with cousin competitions as well. Instead of the “My daddy can whoop your daddy’s ass” kind of comparisons, this is “My daughter can out marry your daughter.” Or “My son can land a better job than your son.”

Of course, being adults this is never said in one’s face. It’s done with tact and finesse befitting the best strategists.

Senario Example:

“Mrs X long time no see! How’s your family doing? How’s your daughter? I heard she works for this-this company.”

“Yes Mrs Y, she just got the job last week and she did mention some stress but I’m sure youngsters these days have it easier than we do. She’s already planning a trip to Korea (jealousy arrows FIRE!) this august to ‘reward herself’, well, as long as she pays the bills, I’m not complaining. I’m sure your son experience the same stress in his job with that-that company.”

“Oh yes, youngster these days have no backbone, I’m sure, but it’s all about the money. It’s enough to keep the family together and put food on the table I suppose. I mean I don’t know what his boss would do without him really, keep sending him overseas to china, korea, japan, (warning! Warning! Arrows deflected, launched heat seeking Envy Missiles!) you just can’t imagine the stress he’s on. He even doesn’t have the time to see his fiancée sometimes (Lock target! Aim! Fire!), poor girl.”

“Hmm yes, poor girl… ( Target hit! Damage control!) oh well, Mrs Y, I would love to chat all day but I’m late for a church meeting already.”

“Oh yes, yes, I’ll talk to you next time. I have to get home as well, have to cook dinner soon. See ya!”

“See ya!”

This is a typical scenario where Mrs X would go home and start nagging her daughter. *sigh* Yes I know it very well. My mom has 8 siblings and all together I have 20 cousins although my mom compares me with only 10 of them cuz they are around my age. This bugs me immensely because I for one like my cousins a lot and am particularly close to a few. That is why when my own mother nags me about this cousin’s job or that cousin’s marriage, I keep quiet.

I admit I have a little green eyed monster in me but it’s not a big one. Still, it’s annoying. There was a time when she nags I would fret about it but now, not really. It’s because I realized it’s not fair to keep comparing myself with others, especially those who are related to me or even more important, who I respect.

In a sense I can understand my mother only wanted me to improve my own life. Any mother would only want what’s best for her own children, right?

Book Rant

Title: Confessions of a Shopaholic
Author: Sophie Kinsella

On a frist look the cover’s bright, almost too bright, like those girls in pink outfits complete with pink bags and shoes. No decent man would be caught dead with this book because not only for it's cover but also for it's intimate desription of a very scary world of a regular working woman in England.

Rebecca Bloomwood is a 25yr old with all the worst and the best of luck. She’s a shopaholic and a desperate one. Overdrawn in credit cards, she’s got bankers on her shadow and bargain sales in her sight. She would twitch and squirm if not in a place of new bright shiny purchasable goods. Tell her it’s on sale, it’s one of a kind and it can be charged on either visa or master, she’s hooked.

Every new working woman can sympathize with poor Rebecca. The more depressed she gets with her debts, her lack of social life, the more she spends and yet many can understand the kind of rut she gets herself into because let’s face it, we have been (or still are) there or worse, are going to be. Women, for some reason, have no will power against shopping.

Add to that, she seems to have the knack in winding up in the most hilarious and embarassing situations. A nut in a rut, she frantically tries to find ways to wipe out her debt problems, even date a millionaire?

A good light read to tickle the funny bone. I reckon is book is worth charging to one's visa card.

In All Honesty..

Dear Lord,

On this joyous occasion in celebration of St. Valentine, we pray...

...for all those who are cashing in on this event. May they won't go and burn in hell for charging their customers extra $10 bucks for a bunch of roses just because it was flown in from Newburbia or somewhere remote and equally unheard of.

...for St.Valentine so that he may not turn in his grave when couples fight over ridiculous reasons and demands.

...for my brother who has this brilliant idea of asking his sister to get a bouquet of roses flown in from Newburbia. "I'll pay you back later." Brilliant.

...for every single who doesn't have a date, may they remember that there's many kind of love. Such as love for family, friends, books , gaming, chocolates, wine, shopping sprees, etc, etc, etc.

...for those who watch romantic movies. May God help them if they even think for one second that any of it is real. One can hope, but please, try not to believe in a movie catered to strumming heart strings.

...for oprah who pointed at a photograph taken from a magazine depicting a bride smiling to a groom. "This is a photograph, these two are surrounded by a dozen of people, he's got a light shining on him and there's someone telling her to smile more. Then after the shoot, these two people put back on their jeans and will never see each other again."

...for all this, and much more, Dear Lord, we pray. Amen.

10 Things I Love About Brunei

1. People here practice indifference and mutual respect for other race and religion. Look at my circle of friends, malay, Chinese-dusun-muslim, Chinese-roman-catholic, Chinese-buddist, Chinese-christian, Chinese-muslim, Indian-roman-catholic…and the list goes on and on.
   
2. There is free medical treatment and education provided. I had fun in my government school. Best years of my school life. Although, I had to wear a tudung. Confound it.
   
3. Crime rate is incredibly low, even for a small nation. I can go out alone, have a meal at an outdoor restaurant and go home at 1 in the morning without much worry. I feel safe. I don’t have to live behind barred windows or doors. Seriously, if someone pulled out a gun, we wouldn’t know how painful it can be. Now if someone pulled out a parang…
   
4. Green stuff, lovely greenery every where. Brunei is 75% rainforest. A cure for AIDS could be in there somewhere.
   
5. It’s peaceful. No political hum drum. No rar rar, down with this and that, burn him in hell, kind of stuff.
   
6. Brunei maintains friendly relations with other countries. You don’t see us getting all hoity toity when the Japanese published a textbook that white washes it’s militarist past.
   
7. The people here are friendly and warm. Or busybodies. One time my brake wasn’t working properly and I had to use the hand brake. Even still, some guys stopped by to see if I needed help or if I was alright. It was great. Then one of them asked for my phone number. Yeesh.
   
8. Most Bruneians can communicate, at least, in 2 languages. If the person is Chinese, then it’s 3. Although my Chinese is…different…as I was sometime told.
   
9. Brunei has no tax for food or luxury items. I can actually afford to buy my own car with my own money.
   
10. Alcohol is banned from Brunei. No one is allowed to sell alcohol. So I’m kinda glad, cuz then I wouldn’t have to worry about people I care about becoming alcoholics. My grandfather was one.
    

10 Things I Hate About Brunei

1. Bruneians do not know how to watch a movie in a cinema properly. Dammit ppl, switch off your p.diddy missy elliot 50 cents wannabe mobiles! And stop talking while the movie is playing!
   
2. I’m born here, but I’m a permanent resident. Not a citizen of Brunei. Go figure.
   
3. Brunei would develop a tad faster. Come on la, some highways are not even properly lit. People die in accidents, heeellloooo?
   
4. Some people here actually think that Harry Potter is some kind of cult. Well, er, PRETIFICUS!
   
5. I wish the libraries here are bigger and better. With all kinds of updated books.
   
6. A lot of stuff can use a lot of work. Such as our free medical treatment and education system. Yes, I love that it’s free, but I hate that it’s limited in a way. When my brother was young he had a huge ulcer problems, in the end, we had to take him to Singapore to find a solution.
   
7. People here take their life for granted. Some flaunt their money like it’s just a big game of Monopoly.
   
8. A lot here are dependant on the oil and gas industry. I shudder to think when it all runs out. What? You didn’t know? It WILL run out one day.
   
9. I hate how some people work here. Hello, it’s called work, not slouch, scratch one’s butt and dig nose kind of thing. I wish I can drop them in the Middle East or better yet New York and let them see what real work is about. Jeez, a lot still dream of sitting their asses behind a government desk job. What kind of career is that? Do we even have a Bruneian word for CAREER?
   
10. There is no Sea World in Brunei.
    
    
    
    
    

Minamoto Yoshitsune (1159-1189)
(Part 2)

Yoshitsune's war efforts were recognized by the court, thus was granted the same titles as his brother Noriyori. This infuriated Yoritomo who didn't wish to see his youngest brother to be involved with court politics.
Well, too late.

Around this time our hero met the lovely Shizuka Gozen, a shirabyoshi, who performed dances for gods. She became his favourtie concubine, and during his last years, she followed as he fled from his capital residence and into hiding.

However, later she became pregnant and was deposited in a temple where she was found and brought to Yoritomo. Here she was questioned on the whereabouts of her lover but she stayed loyal and remained silent. She then gave birth to a baby boy who, by the orders of Yoritomo, was put to death.

If that wasn't enough, after she recovered, she was the ordered to preform a dance. She was forced to preform in front of Yoritomo. So she did and in the middle of it all, she burst into a defiant song declaring her love for Yoshitsune. This, of course, made Yoritomo pretty pissed and wanted her executed on the spot but because she was a dancer for the gods (a quiet famous to boot), he was convienced to do otherwise. She was commanded to shave her head and become a nun. She did so but a year later she died, presumably out of despair for her lost lover and dead son. She was only 19.

Yoshitsune continued on fleeing from the capital and went to his past mentor, Fujiwara Hidehira. Remember Fujiwara was already an old man before, so this time, he's practically on his deathbed. But before he died, he made sure Yoshitsune was installed in a small mansion, well cared and protected. However, this didn't last long, as after his death, one of his sons, Yasuhira, decided that Yoshitsune had to go.

Yasuhira went against his father's wishes and offered Yoshitsune's position to Yoritomo.

In the dead of the night, a small army crept close to the mansion, and it was there Yoshitsune with his faithful retainers faught their last battle. In the very last moments, Benkei, his most loyal friend and retainer, blocked the main door way with his very own corspe by impaling himself on his own sword. After Yoshitsune realised there was no escape, he killed his own wife and children, then commited sepukku. With the same dagger that old man Fujiwara Hidehira gave him. He was 30 yrs old.

"Their exploits and presonalities have been so embellished by legend and choronicle, so operatically distorted by Kabuki and Noh drama that, except for a few facts about their accomplishments and their deaths, they have become men of glamour and mystery."

"One can visit Benkei's tomb in the ruins of Hiraizumi but does the great monk really lie there? None one knows."

Lynn Guest, 'Children of Hachiman'

Of course, this doesn't stop Yoshitsune into becoming a legend in Japanese history.

Not only there are famous skits preforms by Kabuki and Noh based on his story, but there's a PS2 game also titled Genji (I'm playing it at the moment. The graphics are amazing but game play is alright. Nothing really exciting or new.)

In Japan, there's a TV series playing, also based on his life. The actor playing Yoshitsune is Hideaki Takizawa.

Well, at least they weren't kidding when they said he was a hansome fella.

For a more detailed record go to this site http://www.samurai-archives.com/yoshitsune.html

It has dates, names, places where he battled, etc, then whole kebab. For some reason I can't find much on Shizuka Gozen. Perhaps she herself is a myth, incoperated into the his legend to bring in a sense of romance and tragedy. However, there are many people who believe that she really existed. She herself was also so popular in legend that...

"Centuries later, when the first Geisha appeared they claimed the beautiful and spirited dancer [Shizuka Gozen] as their ancestor."

Lesley Downer, 'Geisha : The secret history of a vanishing world'

As for his tyrant of a brother, Yoritomo, he went on to install the first Samurai Dokoro (samurai government if you will) and became Shogun (the highest rank a samurai can achieve) but his power and rule didn't last long.

He fell off his horse and suffered internal injuries. He died soon after. It was rumoured that he saw the ghost of the betrayed Yoshitsune, back to haunt him. Whether this is true or not, one can only imagine, however, keep in mind that a samurai is a superb horseman among other things. In one hand he might be delusional, on the other, his horse might have been startled by something else and threw its rider off.

The samurai dokoro's power soon became corrupted and full of conspiracies. The title shogun was, like the Emperor, placed on a child as a mere puppet for the real hands of power. The last was the Tokugawa shogunate which fell in 1868, around the time of Perry's first visit to Japan. The shogunate was Japan military government, 2nd in power only after the Emperor, for nearly 700 years.

Minamoto Yoshitsune (1159-1189)
(Part 1)

The first time I read about this legendary samurai was in the book 'The Children of Hachiman' by Lynn Guest. The book iteslf came to me by chance.

A friend was migrating to Australia back when I was 15yrs old. Right before that, her house flooded because of a storm the previous night, so they had to clear everything out. At the same time I was visiting, saying goodbye and so on, when her brother invited me to pillage any books around.

I was happy and picked two books. One of them being 'Children of Hachiman'. At that time, I found it kinda boring and set it aside for many years, until one boring afternoon I picked it up again. After that it became one of my favourites.

Yoshitsune was the youngest son of Minamoto Yoshitomo who died while he attempted to defy the Taira Clan. Later one of his wives and children were found but not executed, Yoshitsune was one of them. Instead, he was sent to a temple where he ran away before he was forced to take his vow.

Later he was given the Sword of Hachiman, which was a legendary sword said to be fored by the great Hachiman God himself. It's been passed down from father to son in the Minamoto Clan for generations. Although by rights it should've been passed to Minomoto Yoritomo, his eldest brother......but for some reason (his talent perhaps in handling a sword) it was passed to him.

He ran away to Mutsu, where the governor, Fujiwara Hidehira, gave him shelter and treated him like his own son. At the time Hidehira was already an old man but still go on hunts on horseback daily. He admired Yoshitsune for his youthful vigor and sword skill. So much so that he passed Yoshitsune a priceless hierloom, a small dagger (usually used to preform Speukku).

Later our young hero goes to join his older brother, the head of the Minamoto Clan, Yoritomo. In his youthful mind, perhaps, he pictured his brothers and himself, riding side by side, charging into a battle or something equally dramatic. But it was said that he never got along with his older brother, who was a proud and suspicious man. Disillusioned, Yoshitsune vow to prove that he is a samurai that one can be proud of.

Off he set to win victory after victory in the name of the clan. It was an era of war, of one powerful samurai clan against another, Minamoto VS Taira.

But the Taira has some pretty big connections. One of the Taira daughters was given to the Emperor and have birth to a son. Taira Kiyomori, head of the Taira Clan, was the grandfather of a future emperor.

Many things contributed to Yoshitsune's downfall. During the preparations before a war champaign, he argued with Kajiwara Kagetoki, one the right hand men of Yoritomo. This later further fueled the animosity between the two brothers. Later Yoritomo refused to grant Yoshitsune court titles, the same that was given to Noriyori (also their brother, older than Yoshitsune, younger than Yoritomo), eventhough Yoshisune had won many battles and deserved the honour.

A lot speculated that Yoritomo was jealous of Yoshitsune's popularity among the common folk and people of the court alike. Not only he inherited the Sword of Hachiman but he was reputed as a good looking fella with an even greater reputation as a cunning strategist and brilliant general. Most probably Yoritomo feared that his younger brother would raise an army to take over the position of head of the Minamoto Clan.

[end of Part 1)

Tung Tu Lung Tung Chiang

When my mother starts changes all the curtains and scrubbing the kitchen walls, I know it's close to Chinese New Year. My mother, given her occupation in life, has always been a tad 'sot' (crazy) about cleanliness. Her motto, if she has one, could easily be something like "Cleanliness is next to Godliness." Or something along those lines.

Then there's the shopping. Woah the shopping. It's as if we don't have enough stuff already in the house, she went out buying who knows what for the new year. Other than the 'must have' for the new year such as new clothes, the usual tibits and drinks, ang pows, new money, etc, etc, etc. There's also the 'don't need but get it anyway. Decorations and whatever ki ling ka lang she needs to decorate the house with.

Just yesterday my sisters skipped into my room, clearly walking on air, and said "Sis! Would you like to see what we got for chinese new year?" Actually I don't care much, but to amuse them, hey why not? They are cute when they are excited.

What I am looking foward to is the Dancing Lions from Chung Hua School. Every year I would try to make it in time to watch them preform. The loud drum beats, the crowd of people, the kids sitting in front just so they can touch the lions as they pass by. It's rumoured that if you manage to get a peice of fur from the lion, it can be kept as a good luck charm.


[Yes that guy is wearing make up. Looks like the monkey king, doesn't he?] ----->

I only know of two lion dance troupes. One from Chung Hua Middle school and another one from the chinese community of Seria. I have a friend who belongs to the latter. He has been 'tung tu lung tung chiang' for 7 years now. I hope this year I'll be able to take some pictures to share with everyone.

There's a lot of superstition for the new year. First everything and EVERYTHING, down to the last sock, underwear and fish bowl, must be cleaned. That is to wash or get rid of the bad luck of the previous year. On the stroke of midnight, everyone would put out pow chang or fire crackers to ward away the evil spirits and bad luck. All the doors, and windows even, would be open to welcome the new year and again, good luck. Along with the mosquitoes.

On the first day of CNY, cannot sweep or clean the floor, or else the good luck might be swept away. Eeveryone would wear all their new clothes, wish mom and day fatt choy (wish you get real holy to golden frogs rich, Daddy & Mommy.) Then start receiving relatives and later go out with friends to visit other friends and er, spread the wealth around a bit so to speak. Or maybe to rake it in. Hehehe. I will not lie to you, alcohol will be consumed, nonsense will happen, and good thing I don't usually drive while going pai nein (visiting).

Chinese New Year is mainly celebrated by the chinese but over here we have other races visiting and enjoying the festivities as well. Like Patricia, even though she's a muslim now, she will be opening her house on the 29th and everyone is invited. Hahaha, Pat will kill me if her house overflows. >_<

<------- [Chinese New Year celebrations in San Francisco! How cool is that?]


I myself am a christian but I still continue to celebrate chinese new year. I mean, hello, I may believe in God but I'm still chinese what. I'm sure there's nothing in the Bible that said 'Thou shall not eat nien kao or receive ang pow.'

But that's what Chinese New Year is all about. It's visiting relatives and friends, wishing them a prosperous year, drinking to their health and looking foward to a good year together.

Hehe, I can't bloody wait.

WiFi at Wy Wy

Last time I wrote about WiFi at OGDC where it wasn't a hang out. It was a place where parents bring their kids out to surf on their laptops. I suspect it's an attempt on the parent's part to show there's more out of their house. Normal outside stuff like, you know, the sun, the man eating koi.

Since the cost of getting a Laptop has gone considerably down recently, I see more and more of them mushrooming everywhere. Carried in sleek laptop bags, in cybercafes, at home and heck, even my executive was provided one from the company.

So it makes sense that other cafes or restaurants start jumping into the WiFi bandwagon. Hey, if there's money to be made from metro geeks here, why not? After all, the savvy cool crowd who hangs out here and those who hang around just to look at the cool crowd, ain't really enough. Gotta catch them all.

This is place is formally known as Restoran Nasi Ayam WyWy. The locals just call it the new WyWy place at Pandan Lima.

It's quiet a large place with an outside area for smokers. Inside there are open tables and cosy booths for family and couples to dine. I like hanging outside cuz they have sockets in case my josey's batt dies. (For some reason they don't have them inside the building.)

The menu here is fairly decent with a wide range of stuff to choose from. However, that doesn't guarantee that all of them are tasty. I just like their teh and honey dew bubble milk tea here. I haven't eaten anything from here so far that I particularly drool for. I think it's because they have such a wide variety of dishes that they don't specialize in any of them. Their chicken rice, only so-so.

However, their range of drinks and deserts are good. I had a fruit salad + yam ice cream sorta like ABC desert the other night here. It was good.

Although the WiFi sucks at times, 7 out of 10 the WiFi here is decent enough. I come here mainly because it's closest to my house. It's only a 10 mins drive. Much better than the 20 - 30 mins drive (depending on traffic, there's often big trucks or vehicles slowing the traffic on that particular seria road) to OGDC.

Why is it called WyWy? It's probably opened by the same two brothers who opened the big chain of game/accesories/mobile stores called WyWy and JJ (Jill & Jill).

Or at least that's what I heard.

Don Mozarella talks about Do and Don't

Don’ts

1. Don’t toss your friends around like they are nothing to you. In the end, you end up being nothing to anyone.

2. Don’t diss your friends just cuz you have a new job, new life, new wife, new gf, new bf, whatever la. Fixing up a broken friendship is a bitch and a ½.

3. Don’t think your friends will understand all the time. Yes they understand that you can’t hang with them or that you may not reply to their messages but if you don’t understand how they miss or care about you, well, go get your head fixed.

4. Don’t be a p*ssy and stay angry with friends just cause they make a mistake. Think about how many times you have made mistakes and how good it feels to be forgiven.

5. Don’t take advantage of your friends, cuz you’ll only be taken advantaged on by leech suckers friends. They’ll be the only ones left clinging onto you.

Do’s

1. Do be forgiving and honest with your friends. Only those who remain are honest enough to tell you in your face they care about you and when you’re being a total bitch.

2. Do remember that ‘friends forever’ isn’t really true. Friends can’t be there for you forever. It’s impractical. But treasuring your memories with them and staying friends even if they are at the other end of the earth, is possible and even better.

3. Do take the initiative and invite friends out for a night in town or a dinner and drinks at your home. If everyone is waiting for the other to do something, then pffff, better start talking to your plants.

4. Do miss your friends and call or msg them sometimes.

5. Do share things with friends. Share your fun, share your misery, share your successes, share life.

As for me, if someone cuts me, fine. I forgive you. Pretentious pompous portentous pricks. Have your people call my people, apologize, then maybe we’ll do lunch.

Or according to Don Mozarella, I should just go to the matresses and shoot them.

You Can Like the Life You're Living, You Can Live the Life You Like. (From the Movie 'Chicago')

Out of the blue, a friend asked me today, "Why are you so addicted to the internet? What about your real life in Brunei or your family and friends? Don't you think you are missing out on what's available here and now?"

In a way I can understand what she's trying to tell me. The grass isn't always greener on the other side, but I want to find out for myself, is that so wrong? Let me point out several things and just randomly rant.

Okay I admit Brunei isn't all that bad, it's still a developing country so I'll cut her some slack. Brunei is a deep emerald of a jewel, with the friendly people, low crime rate, oil & gas income, green stuff everywhere and overally a very relaxing environment. I have a few malaysian and singaporean friends who came over said, "Brunei is so peaceful (yes i know, abode of peace) and relaxing (not much traffic or rush rush or kill kill, dog eat dog going on here)"

But seriously, do you want to be retired before you even started to live? There's a whole world out there just waiting for you to explore. If you think that everything worth discovering has already been discovered, then you are wrong. I don't mean travelling or backpacking through europe (although that's a good idea too) but even in your own living room, communicating with other people from other countries. It's an enriching experience by its own right.

Then you learn to socialize and start caring about people, listen to their stories and descriptions about their country or environment. What their ineterests are and sometimes their worries and problems. In a way, for me, it felt good to be able to help my online friends somehow just by listening to them, talking to them, giving or receiving advice. Just goes to show, a world of people who never met can still care for each other, is not such a bad world after all.

On this kind of road in life, there's just so many ways we can choose to travel it. My way is different from yours. I love Brunei, it will always be the country where my heart grew up in. It doesn't mean though, that it will be the place where my heart stays. You think we would be able to fly to the moon just by talking or dreaming about it? If you have the technology and means to go there, why not?

There is just so much out there to discover, to learn. So much to learn...*lol* I will forever thirst for knowledge. So since I don't own a Jet or millions of dollars where i can just go anywhere and try out anything with just a snap of my fingers. *I don't think it'll be a rewarding experience at all. Would be fun but not rewarding.*

For now I only have Josey (BenQ Laptop) and Renee Baby (Toyota Rav4) . So why dun just let me explore the virtual world to my heart's content? Cuz in the end, I'll still swhich off Josey, drive Renee Baby back to my home in Kuala Belait, Brunei Darrusalam, and say, "Hi, mom, hi sis, I'm home."